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Archive for March, 2006

Running with scissors

March 25th, 2006 2 comments

Ok, so there I was with a set of scissors in my pants about to cut off my…. hmm, maybe some back-story.

Working the night shift we’re a lot less concerned about who or what is observing us, since it’s the same 4 guys every night. we wear torn jeans, slouch, burp, etc. It’s a very unassuming atmosphere. I decided my torn:untorn jeans ratio was becoming too large and something must be done about it. I bebop’d down to the local Old Navy, making a stop at the “Poor Financial Decision Institute” (commonly known as “Starbucks”). I found myself a pair of jeans with 4 to badass and 3 to sexy. good to go. Fast forward to today. I’m sitting down in the “men’s only” private office attending a conference call with nature, and I noticed there was some kind of security tag fastened to the inner seam of my zipper. I guess pin-on tags just don’t cut it anymore. It was fused in between 2 layers of seatbelt grade cloth and said warned me of the foul things that would befall me if I didn’t remove it prior to washing. After hanging up on the conefrence call and wiping off the speaker I headed into the breakroom to cut off the offending security tag. So there I was with a set of scissors in my pants about to cut off my tag, when I heard a very emphatic “What in the fuck?!” from behind me. Apparently one of my coworkers was confused as to why I was standing in the break room jabbing a set of scissors around into my opened fly. I hadn’t really checked to see who was around before unzipping my fly and whipping out my…. security tag. Hey at least my back was to the entrance of the room.

Moral of the story: look both ways before shoving scissors down your pants.

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Pine (not a post about email)

March 23rd, 2006 5 comments

It smells like pine on I-290. Why does it smell like pine? They are doing their periodic deforestation near the road. They tend to clear out the first 12 feet or so of vegetation from the side of the road do leave a big clear swath next to the breakdown lane. Their reasoning for this, I am told, is to save lives. A study was done by the Massachusetts DMV and it was found that when cars flew off the roads due to one reason or another, they tended to smash into trees and whatnot in the first 12 feet or so of vegetation next to the road. So clearly to save lives, these homicidal trees should be done away with and shredded into little bits so they can no longer harm people. Good thinking saves lives. what could go wrong?

It turns out that after this is done, cars fly off the road, past the newly cleared terrain, and smash into the first 12 feet or so of vegetation beyond that.

I should note that this was one of the MA DMV’s brighter ideas.

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Public service message

March 17th, 2006 6 comments

It’s 8:08. Do you know where your techno is?

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emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected

March 11th, 2006 No comments

emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected

The above spam is what my nights at work have been like for the last couple weeks. Tons of this one IPCC alert, “emsgDmpDeviceDisconnected”. It usually ends up being a trash event. The device returns with full connectivity when it’s checked up on pretty much every time. yet I get to build a 24h action ticket every time we get one of these stupid events and I get to wake someone up over it. why we can’t just check up on these myself and avoid that whole shitstorm is beyond me. Sucks for the on-call engineer too. Last week we had to call the poor guy 3-5 times during the night, every night of the week.

In other news, a certain company has been getting on my nerves. We’ll call them “Badwich” for the sake of anonymity. the text behind the cut was a separate post, but I took pity on my friends list.

Upgrade your crap equipment plz.

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March 9th, 2006 4 comments

There have been a few people lately I’ve mentioned the “turtle statue” to recently. It’s a piece of *art* found in a very busy part of downtown worcester. Seems a lot of people, even locals, can’t recall it when I mention it. This is odd considering the subject matter of the art… it’s rather memorable. linked is a site with photos from a few different angles to show you what I’m talking about.

Linky

Perhaps this is from a more innocent time when the boy would be viewed as simply “holding” the turtle. yeah, that’s likely. Just like the fine folks at Time Magazie had no idea what famous picture this resembled (no, I will not link the other picture you sick fucks).

In any event, I can’t help but feel bad for the poor turtle

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This is for the people of the sun

March 8th, 2006 2 comments

WTF? Me, a day walker? I’m going to be rubbing elbows with the Norms? It seems I’m to go on the day shift earlier than expected. Next week, in fact, the new hire is coming in to replace me. I’ll be going days as soon as he is up to speed. I estimate a week, 2 weeks tops. Ain’t that some shit? I’ll be working wed-sat. So sunday monday and tuesday off. 7a-3p wed-fri, and 7a-7p saturday. the 7am thing is going to suck for traffic, but at least I get to leave before rush hour. I have ALL my evenings to myself. I get to have this “social life” thing I keep hearing about now. and I even get to try out “sleep”. I wonder if I can handle it all.

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